rain & watercolor change

December 17, 2015

It's raining today and I am in the process of changing. Moving from one state of being to another. In transition. Maybe you are too? It's not easy. I've heard there is no way out, though. Only through. 

Uncertainty about seemingly big things like love life, future potential, purpose, worth, success and failure...the precariousness of an identity can be scary to put into words. And I love words. 

But lately I've been painting.

One watercolor a day. or two, or three. Or none. When I am moved. When my heart swells with emotion that I know is both temporary and important, fleeting and indelible. That is when I paint.

It only takes ten minutes. A break from the work day. I push the brush across paper and watch the color stain. I let go of logic and reason and even words in order to sense how colors will blend, in order to express the inexpressible.

I understand what they mean when they say that art heals. It doesn't fix, though. Maybe healing is not about fixing at all. Maybe healing is transition.

It's raining today and I am in the process of changing. I've heard there is no way out. Only through. 


p.s. a little update on issue two : it's done. well, done in the sense that i finally stopped editing and sent it to karly to review for design. it took a full six months longer than i expected. i am learning. soon, we will send it to the printer. i can not wait to share this beauty with you all, especially our incredible indiegogo contributors. big love.